Chapter 20
Vanessa stood at the bookstore entrance, staring at the heavy rain. She hesitated for a few seconds before finally putting her bag over her head and rushing out.
The icy rainwater instantly soaked through her clothes, streaming down from her hair into her collar and chilling her skin.
She jogged across the street, water splashing under her feet. In a daze, she thought she heard someone calling her name from behind.
“Nessa!”
She spun around abruptly, but the street behind her was deserted. Only streaks of rain were beneath the dim glow of the streetlights, their reflections rippling in the puddles.
Realizing it was just another hallucination, Vanessa shook her head and quickly returned to her apartment.
In the middle of the night, Vanessa jolted awake from a restless sleep. Her forehead was burning hot, and her throat was dry as if scorched by fire. Thunder rumbled outside while lightning lit up the room, briefly illuminating her reflection in the mirror.
Her face was deathly pale, her lips cracked, and her eyes bloodshot.
She coughed and pushed herself up to get water. However, the moment she stood, the room spun violently, and she collapsed to the floor. Pain shot from her knee to her temples, and then the memories came crashing in.
In the snow, Matthias shielded her with his body, blood soaking into the white. “Nessa, live on…”
Alexander stood at the edge of the frozen lake, eyes cold. “Watch her. Don’t let her come up.”
On the auction stage, his voice was cold and detached. “Vanessa, get on stage.”
Finally, came the choking pressure of water flooding her lungs.
Vanessa screamed as she curled up on the floor, nails digging into her palms as tears mixed with sweat poured down her face.
It all came back.
Matthias’ death, Alexander’s cruelty, and the five years of numb desperation.
She bit her lower lip so hard until she tasted blood, forcing herself to stay silent through the
2/4
scream trapped in her chest.
At the crack of dawn, the fever had subsided. Vanessa sat by the window and watched the morning light gradually dispel the darkness.
On the coffee table lay traces of her life in Merathea these past months-her bookstore work ID, seashells collected from the beach, and thriving plants on the balcony.
This small apartment was the new world she had built with her own hands.
A world without the Hawke family, hatred, and the man who had caused her unbearable pain. She gently touched the nonexistent ring mark on her ring finger.
Matthias had placed it there when he proposed, but she could never find it after the car accident.
She whispered to the empty air; “Matthias, you were right. Living… really is difficult.”
The morning breeze rustled through the curtains, carrying the salty tang of seawater.
By dawn, Vanessa had already composed herself. She changed into a simple white shirt and jeans, loosely pinning up her long hair.
Her reflection in the mirror was both familiar and strange. Her eyes no longer held their former humility and obsession. They were replaced by a sense of calmness that came after weathering the storms in life.
The wind chimes at the bookstore entrance rang clearly. As soon as Vanessa pushed open the glass door, she saw Alexander standing at the checkout counter, holding a bouquet of blue irises.
Hearing the sound, he whirled around, a flash of hope appearing in his eyes. His voice was somewhat hoarse as he said, “You’re here.”
Vanessa calmly took the flowers and trimmed the stems with practiced ease. “Mr. Hawke still
favors irises, I see.”
Alexander was shocked and blurted, “Y-You remember? How much do you remember?”
“Everything,” she replied, placing the flowers in fresh water with a flat tone.
Alexander’s face instantly turned ashen. He opened his mouth but couldn’t make a sound, only clenching his fists so tightly that his knuckles turned white.
Vanessa even smiled slightly. “Don’t worry. I’m not acknowledging this to settle old scores. Those things… are all in the past now.”
“Vanessa…” Alexander sounded broken. “I found out the truth about what happened back then. Lucille, she-”
Chapter 20
3/4
“I know,” she interrupted him. “The news covered it all in detail.”
Alexander froze in place as if struck by lightning. “You… Don’t you… Don’t you have anything you want to ask?”
“Hmm…” She pondered for a moment, her tone carrying polite courtesy. “Mr. Hawke, methods are as decisive and ruthless as always.”
your
The title stung.
He suddenly grabbed her hand. “Please don’t call me that… I know I messed up, I—”
“Let go.” Vanessa’s voice wasn’t loud, but it was firm and clear.
He jerked his hand back like he’d been burned. Only then did she continue, “I meant it when I said the past is over. I don’t hate you, but I won’t have anything to do with you again.”
Alexander pulled a velvet box from his suit jacket pocket and opened it with trembling hands. Inside was a somewhat tarnished silver ring.
“Matthias…” Vanessa gasped. However, she quickly regained her composure, surprising even herself. “I thought it was lost.”
“It was found at the crash site,” Alexander said, placing the box on the counter. “It was wedged between rocks by the riverbank, and somehow-.”
Vanessa gently closed the lid. “Thank you. But these things don’t matter anymore.”
“Then what does matter?” Alexander suddenly raised his voice. “Vanessa, give me a chance to make amends… please.”
The sunlight outside had grown stronger, casting a clear dividing line on the floor between
them.
Vanessa looked at the man who had once crushed her beneath his heel. Now, he stood there like a beggar, pleading for forgiveness.
She felt an unexpected pang of compassion at the sight, and for the first time, she said his full name, “Alexander Hawke, do you know what I regretted most before I jumped into the river?”
Alexander shook his head, his eyes bloodshot.
She continued, “It wasn’t falling in love with Matthias, and it wasn’t giving so much for It was that I’d never lived a single day for myself.”
you.
He finally realized that even though Vanessa had remembered everything, her eyes were just as clear as when she’d lost her memory.
There was no hate or anger, not even the longing he had secretly hoped for.
There was nothing but peace.
“I understand,” he said with difficulty, his voice hoarse beyond recognition. “But at least… let me do something for you.”
Vanessa shook her head and pulled out a box from under the counter. “These are the things you’ve sent over during this time. Please take them with you.”
Alexander didn’t reach for the box. He looked one last time at the woman who had once given him everything, then turned toward the door.
Sunlight streamed in from behind him, casting a long shadow on the floor. The wind chimes rang clearly as his figure disappeared into the bright sunshine.
Vanessa stood there motionless, then suddenly burst into tears.
It wasn’t for Matthias or Alexander, but for herself -for the woman who had finally learned how to cry for her own sake.
