Scrubbing in, disinfecting, gowning up, gloves on.
The surgical drape was spread out, and Elias picked up the scalpel. Gone was his usual rock–solid confidence–anxiety was written all over his face.
The surgical lights revealed every shadow.
Elias had already positioned the blade against the surgical film, but he kept turning his head away.
His Adam’s apple bobbed, cold sweat nearly dripping onto the sterile field.
“Dr. Shaw? Dr. Shaw?”
Someone seemed to be calling him.
But everything on that operating table looked like demons to him now.
Elias couldn’t take it anymore. He threw down the scalpel and bolted from the OR.
followed behind him, watching his breakdown, witnessing the fall of a brilliant surgeon.
he might never operate again.
the hospital took Elias’s condition very seriously, sending people to investigate the cause. They finally determined it was psychological.
When I hold a scalpel and stand at that table, all I can think about is that night when they were trying to save
lara.”
Three times. I had three chances to save her. All she needed was a simple burr hole. I knew that–so why did I let
er die?”
Eventually, I actually told them to stop trying! Even if the chances were next to nothing, she still deserved a fighting
hance!”
Doctor, if she knew that…she must hate me so much.”
Actually, I don’t hate you that much.
sighed, but of course he couldn’t hear me.
Everyone knew Elias was completely washed up.
What kind of orthopedic surgeon can’t hold a scalpel?
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My Orthopedic Boyfriend Chose His Childhood Sweetheart on the Operating Table
Chapter 13
The hospital tried to get him to transfer to internal medicine for a fresh start.
He refused outright, insisting on staying to guard my skeleton.
People came to convince him in waves. Finally, Dr. Grant stepped in personally. “You already caused the death of one excellent neurosurgeon. Are you going to destroy another orthopedic surgeon too?”
“Unless you can prove your worth, why should the hospital keep you here?”
Elias had no answer. He gritted his teeth and tried countless times, but always failed.
He seemed forever trapped in that moment, completely hopeless and broken.
I’d once fallen for the sharp focus in his eyes during surgery. Now all I saw was endless sorrow.
He was eventually transferred to research, because he’d accept any arrangement as long as he didn’t have to leave
orthopedics.
On the day he picked up a scalpel again for lab work, I seemed to see past and future shadows overlapping.
Back to where all the entanglements began.
Turns out I wasn’t without resentment and obsession after all.
ed to sense something and looked in my direction.
ve you forgiven me?”
How could I possibly?
I studied his features and felt only like I was looking at a stranger.
I will never forgive you.
Live with that guilt eating away at you, Elias Shaw.
I’m leaving now.
And I hope I never see you in heaven.
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My Orthopedic Boyfriend Chose His Childhood Sweetheart on the Operating Table